[If you think that flat tone will dissuade Ardyn from ramping up to facetiousness to eleven, you're wrong.]
Oh, quite well, Pitou. [He leans against table.] It's been a lovely day so far, though there are skeptics out there who doubt the validity of my magical prowess.
["Prowess", he says, even though it's little more than a convenient way to carry his crap.]
[That reaction only makes his grin widen. There's something about how Pitou acts like an annoyed cat around him that he finds funny. Not to the point of cruelty, because Ardyn will always concede at some point, but he doesn't ever feel guilty for it. He's sure the feeling is somewhat... probably... mutual.
In any case, he waves a hand due his usual habit of over-gesturing.]
But you're wrong. It does. Here, let me show you.
[Except apparently that over-gesturing served a purpose this time. A flicker of red light, looking like crystal shards, appear in the wake of his hand's movements. Out of absolutely nothing, one law book... two... three... appear mid-air, materializing from the light itself.
They drop to the desk with an unceremonious thud, accentuating his point. Always about the dramatics, this one.]
[ Pitou's eyes narrow down to slits. That sure had looked good, but the problem for them is a deep base in the world of things which can be explained. Physics, anatomy, medicine, science. Their life was split half and half between pure selfishly defined aesthetic pleasures and the solid facts of science. Even the time spent volunteering was a mixture of simple appreciation for fuzzy creatures as well as in depth understanding of their reproductive systems, their animal needs and habits as dictated by scientific study.
There's nothing Pitou looks at without a burning need to break it into those pieces.
They reach out to pick up one of the books, turning them over slowly. Too big to be hidden up a sleeve, too solid to have changed shape, but the idea that they came out of nothing was, patently, preposterous. They lift their eyes without lifting their head, a terrible kind of intrigue on their face. Magic is a stupid word, but they want to know what is going on all the same. ]
[He's not sure what reaction he expected, but Ardyn should honestly not be surpirsed by anything where Pitou is concerned. The eyes the book, then the other, arching a brow. It's an expression of slight skepticism that replaces his default self-assuredness.]
It only has one speed.
[As far as he knows, at least. Another wave of his hand, and all three disappear in a burst of red magic. The crystals expand outward, practically touching Pitou as they dissolve into nothing -- or they would, if they had any real weight to them.]
Only because you're not trying hard enough, of course you can--
[ What the fuck are they talking about. Their eyebrows pinch, words slowling to nothingness across their lips. They turn a look of suspicion on Ardyn, as if he's the cause of this. But they have to back peddle now, rephrase, ]
[He looks at them, and now it's his turn to knit his brow. He wonders how safe of an assumption that is, when they're dealing with magic. Ardyn barely understands what any of this is, so how could Pitou so easily assume that he could control it beyond what he's already showing them?
He arches his brow higher.]
Easier said than done.
[The books appear again... this time one by one. Purposefully slower in the rhythm of their appearance, but not in the manner in which they actually burst into existence.]
[ Part of Pitou's smile is the simple fact that Ardyn did as they instructed at all, and part of it is because they know they're right. With an unsubstantiated simplicity, they know that not only can this trick be performed excruciatingly slowly, but that practicing it as such will only improve the skill's potential. The potential of it all is mouth watering. They want to know. So much more.
They get up abruptly, going to sort through a clanging tray of washed but not yet sorted and stowed instruments. They come back with a long metal pipe with a hooked end. Some gruesome instrument for doing work inside the skull without cracking it open. ]
Again.
[ They're gonna stick it in there and swivel it around. ]
[He begins to suspect the not-incorrect idea that Pitou does not intend to use that rather terrifying-looking instrument in ways that he would approve of.
Arms folding across his chest, frowning, he says-] What exactly do you intend to do with that?
[He could definitely do that. Or at least begin to slowly step backwards towards the exit. Worse comes to worse, he's going to stick that terribly sharp thing into his hammerspace, too, Pitou.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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How are you, Ardyn?
[ Their tone couldn't possibly be any flatter. ]
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Oh, quite well, Pitou. [He leans against table.] It's been a lovely day so far, though there are skeptics out there who doubt the validity of my magical prowess.
["Prowess", he says, even though it's little more than a convenient way to carry his crap.]
What do you think about that?
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I think that sounds very reasonable, since magic doesn't fucking exist.
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In any case, he waves a hand due his usual habit of over-gesturing.]
But you're wrong. It does. Here, let me show you.
[Except apparently that over-gesturing served a purpose this time. A flicker of red light, looking like crystal shards, appear in the wake of his hand's movements. Out of absolutely nothing, one law book... two... three... appear mid-air, materializing from the light itself.
They drop to the desk with an unceremonious thud, accentuating his point. Always about the dramatics, this one.]
See?
no subject
There's nothing Pitou looks at without a burning need to break it into those pieces.
They reach out to pick up one of the books, turning them over slowly. Too big to be hidden up a sleeve, too solid to have changed shape, but the idea that they came out of nothing was, patently, preposterous. They lift their eyes without lifting their head, a terrible kind of intrigue on their face. Magic is a stupid word, but they want to know what is going on all the same. ]
Slower.
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It only has one speed.
[As far as he knows, at least. Another wave of his hand, and all three disappear in a burst of red magic. The crystals expand outward, practically touching Pitou as they dissolve into nothing -- or they would, if they had any real weight to them.]
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[ What the fuck are they talking about. Their eyebrows pinch, words slowling to nothingness across their lips. They turn a look of suspicion on Ardyn, as if he's the cause of this. But they have to back peddle now, rephrase, ]
Anything can be controlled, Izunia.
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He arches his brow higher.]
Easier said than done.
[The books appear again... this time one by one. Purposefully slower in the rhythm of their appearance, but not in the manner in which they actually burst into existence.]
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They get up abruptly, going to sort through a clanging tray of washed but not yet sorted and stowed instruments. They come back with a long metal pipe with a hooked end. Some gruesome instrument for doing work inside the skull without cracking it open. ]
Again.
[ They're gonna stick it in there and swivel it around. ]
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Arms folding across his chest, frowning, he says-] What exactly do you intend to do with that?
[that's a big ol' nope]
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[ The purr of a threat. ]
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[Please do not come closer with that very scary instrument okay.]
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[ You could always run.... ]
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[He could definitely do that. Or at least begin to slowly step backwards towards the exit. Worse comes to worse, he's going to stick that terribly sharp thing into his hammerspace, too, Pitou.]
You know what? I think it's time I left.
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[ And while Pitou is deathly fucking serious, they're also not going to chase him down. ]
Don't worry, Izunia, we'll catch up again sometime soon.
[ You made a mistake showing this fucked up kitty cat your secret skills. ]
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[He needs to talk to Grell about your violent tendencies, Pitou.
(Also poor Ardyn Izunia, forgetting his books. He'll have to come back for them eventually.)]
Until some other time, when you're less inclined to poke and prod at me... farewell.
[Totally, definitely slipping away.]